Hey Dad Soup

I haven't been able to write anything here for almost a year and a half now because during that time 100% of my energy was focused on supporting Cameron in his battle. Unfortunately I only have 100% to give, unlike some others who seem to have 1000% - like Julie for example. She gave all her love and energy to caring for Cameron and still managed to find even more to deal with other personal issues. I wish I could be more like that - but it is her gift not mine. However, this story is not about Julie - it is about Cameron and how I will miss him. And one thing I will miss in particular is going to the movies - an interest we have shared for many years.

When we were in Toronto we were pretty much confined indoors until one day we discovered the joy of going to matinee movies. It just occurred to us that if we picked the off peak hours then the theaters would be less crowded and less chance of contacting germs etc. We learned to find our way around Toronto in search of movie theaters with wheelchair access and it was very liberating for us both. We saw The Grand Budapest Hotel when it was first released, Guardians of the Galaxy, we watched Need for Speed 3D in a theater that normally seats 300 people. We sat front and center and had the whole place to ourselves. A wonderful memory... The last movie we saw together was The Hobbit here in Fredericton - and we loved it. I remember we stayed until the theme song ended and the last credit had rolled by. Another wonderful memory...

I have to briefly mention movie food because that was always part of the fun too and I don't mean just popcorn. I won't go into detail at this point but I will just ask if you would order a plate of pulled pork nachos with extra cheese sauce and then eat it in the dark with one hand? Well - Cameron did, and more than once!

But what does all this have to do with soup? Very little actually... in fact it has more to do with the movies which I will explain. Cam and I started the tradition of going to movies together many years ago and I suffered through my share of typical "kid" movies like the "Pokemon Movie" for example - so bad I actually fell sound asleep about three times while Cameron enjoyed the whole show.  But the movie that always sticks in my mind is The Goofy Movie which played when Cameron was about 5 years old. It was about Goofy and his son Max and their adventures on a road trip - that's about all the plot detail I remember. Except for that one silly but touching little scene where they were trapped in their car by Big Foot (I told you it was silly...) and Goofy was heating up a can of soup using the cigarette lighter. They had been quarreling about something trivial and Goofy reminded Max how he used to spell out "Hey Dad" in his alphabet soup - Hey Dad Soup. And if you think it made me tear up back then - you should see me now.

I guess this memory sticks with me because ever since he was a kid, Cameron always greeted me with those exact words. Maybe nobody else noticed it - maybe my ears were just tuned to it. I would come home from work and the first thing I would hear would be "Hey Dad - guess what?" or "Hey Dad - let's order a pizza" or my favorite - "Hey Dad - we should go to a movie." It was usually about some small thing but it always started with "Hey Dad" and it always reminded me of Goofy and Max.

This continued right until the end. I dropped in to visit Cam alone one evening and he asked me to come back in about an hour. I went off to read a book for a while and when I came back he seemed to still be resting so I quietly paced the hall outside his room thinking he was asleep. I had no idea he even knew I was there until after a few minutes I heard "Hey Dad... can you get me a blanket?" I was surprised and thrilled and found a blanket right away. Anyone who has ever been a caregiver to a seriously ill person will know how much it means to be able to provide even a small bit of comfort.

So what can I say to finish a simple yet meaningful little story like this? How about "Hey Cam, I will miss you - and I'll be thinking of you always, but especially at the movies."

Love, Dad